Monday 18 November 2013

MEDIATION

In my practice, I have tried to maintain a delicate balance between empathising with my clients and remaining true to my calling as a Mediator who is a 'neutral facilitator' that helps the parties to decide how to solve their problem. Sometimes, empathy can encroach into the terrain of 'neutrality' and 'professionalism'.

What has been your experience?

Related Links

*Mediation Books: Recommended from Edwards Mediation Academy   ow.ly/iK8350AVxBr
*Women in Mediation: Reflections, Challenges & Opportunities   https://hubs.li/HOsYD7JO
*The more we empathise with others, the more generous we are    www.fastcoexist.com/3058231/the-
more-we-empathise-with-others-the-more-generous-we-are
*3 kinds of Empathy: Cognitive, Emotional & Compassionate - Daniel Goleman   www.danielgoleman.info/three-kinds-of-empathy/
*US: Mediation, Neutrality, Political Conflicts & the  2020 Elections by Ken Cloke   https://www.linkedin.com/in/ken-cloke-4b66433.../    https://www.mediate.com/articles/cloke-2020-elections.cfm
*Empathy has a gender bias: Here's how to close the gap   https://www.amazon.com/bond-between-women/dp/1573227390
*Arbitration, Mediation & Mixed Modes: Seeking workable solutions & common ground on Med-Arb, Arb-Med & Settlement-Oriented Activities by Arbitrators by Thomas Stipanowich   https://lnkd.in/gCPqxb4
*Negotiating for life: Liberian women's negotiating skills   https://www.icermediation.org/negotiating-for-life/
*How to be truly helpful when someone is upset: Toxic positivity vs validation/understanding   https://lnkd.in/gBETeuB via tammylenski
*Ensure the future of Mediation: Empowerment through experience generation/mentoring   https://www.eventbrite.co.uk/e/ensure-future-of-mediation/
*Worried about difficult conversation: Advice from a hostage negotiator   https://on.wsj.com/
*Getting beyond 'Yes': Trust, linkage & cooperation can resolve the Ethiopia-Egypt-udan GERD dispute   https://wwwhift your mindset   https://lnkd.in.com,ethiopia-insight.com/2020/09/trust-linkage-cooperation-resolve-ethiopia-egypt-sudan-gerd-dispute/
*Drained by compassion fatigue? Shift your mindset   https://lnkd.in/exfTZmb
*6 habits of highly empathic people   https://www.youtube.com/watch?=G9jC1...
*Applying Cynefin Complexity Theory (CCT) to Mediation   https://lnkd.in/gyafius
*Listening without judging, interrupting or correcting could change someone's life   thriveglobal.com/stories/the-secret-listening-others-permission-to-feel-angela-duckworth
*How to become a scientist of your emotions   https://www.thriveglobal.com/stories/how-to-become-scientist-of-your-emotions/
*The application of non-state-based standards in international Arbitration   https://papers.ssrn.com/sol3/papers.cfm?abstract_id=3609623
*The need for Mediators to adopt an 'M Plus' approach   https://bit.ly/mediationplus
*Can your politics predict how empathic you are?   https://greatergood.berkley.edu/article/item/can_your_politics_predict_how_empathic_you_are/
*The connection between empathy towards others and ethics   https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/empathy-and-relationships/201701/the-connection-between-empathy-towards-others-ethics/
*Listening skills checklist   https://bit.ly/3lCI7Gp
*Curbing 'Implicit Bias': What works & what doesn't   https://www.discoverymagazine.com/mind/curbing-implicit-bias-what-works-what-doesnt/
*'Don't Litigate, Mediate' Testimonials   https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/dont-litigate-mediate-testimonials-yadev-llm-chambers-solicitors/
*10 benefits of Divorce Mediation  https://www.divorcemag.com/blog/10-benefits-divorce-mediation/
*13 signs of high EI   https://www.inc.com/justin-basiro/13-things-emotionally-intelligent-people-do.html
*Australia: Mediation accreditation standards to be modernised    https://www.lawyersweekly.com.au/sme-law/29348-mediation-accreditation-standards-modernised/
*Why we habituallyblame, and what it often costs us   https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/why-we-habitually-blame...michael-toebe/     
*Why Emotional Intelligence matters   https://www.thriveglobal.com/stories/why-emotional-intelligence-matters/
*Brene Brown on Empathy   https://www.youtube.com/watch
*Technology industry's increased use of Mediation & Arbitration   https://lnkd.in/g7FkXYg 
*Virtual Mediation here to stay  #ADR  #Mediation  #ICT  #OnlineMediation   https://www.lawsociety.ie/gazette/top-stories/virtual-mediation-here-to-stay
*Understanding the science behind 'Mindfulness'   thriveglobal.com/stories/understanding-the-science-behind-mindfulness/
*'The Book of Real World Negotiations: Successful strategies from business, government & daily life'  by Joshua N.Weiss   amazon.com
*From Argument to Settlement   https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/from-argument-to-settlement/
*The (un)surprising effectiveness of African Mediation efforts   https://africanarguments.org/2020/07/02/the-unsurprising-effectiveness-of-african-mediation-efforts/
*Divorce does not have to be messy: Try Mediation  https://lnkd.in/g_uCAis   https://lnkd.in/edbXyrg
*Understanding online Mediation - Podcast   https://share.hsforms.com/5956807/
Negotiation skills: Definition & examples   https://www.indeed.com/career-advice/career-development/negotiation-skills//emotion-mediation-understanding-importance-ben-thomson/
*Emotion in Mediation: Understanding its importance   https://www.linkedin.com/pulse
*Criticising others   https://www.cinergycoaching.com/2020/08/criticising-others/
*Why trying to make Mediation a profession is contrary to its purpose   https://caotica.caos-conflict-management.co.uk/why-trying-to-make-mediation-profession-contrary-to-its-purpose/
*Handling Conflict Mediation(s) triggered by Covid-19   https://www.hrmagazine.co.uk/article-details/handling-conflict-mediations-triggered-by-covid-19   https://lnkd.in/dur-vf7
*Virtual Mediation: Key issues & considerations   https://lnkd,in/dtb9ScT
*'Mediating Dangerously - The frontiers of Conflict Resolution' by Kenneth Cloke   amazon.com/mediating-dangerously-the-frontiers-of-conflict-resolution-kenneth-cloke/
*$234,000 grant from Templeton World Charity Foundation Inc. (TWCF) to Nigeria's Dr. Eugene Ohu - LBS/PAU for project: 'Teaching children empathy & compassion through 'Virtual Reality Games' (VRGs)   bit.ly/lbsvrgrant
*Courts encouraging Mediation in England & Wales   https://lnkd.in/dcqduQ5
*Understanding workplace Mediation   https://vimeo.com/439471081/2201a1163
*'Mediation is confidential' Really?   https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/mediation-is-confidential-tracy-gould-shunin
*The 4 steps of listening   https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/4-steps-of-listening
*Is your relationship pressure cooking? Try Mediation   https://lnkd.in/edbXyrg
*Relationship Mediation   https://claritymediation.net/blog/2020/6/11/relationship-mediation/
*Living together, separating & divorcing: Surviving during a pandemic - Over 70 leading Mediators help you deal with the loss of income, lack of accommodation, etc   https://www.amazon.com/living-together-separating-divorcing-accommodation-ebook/dp/BO88MF1W3M
*Child-friendly tips for separated parents during the Covid-19 crisis   https://www.pandemic.relationships.com/child-friendly-tips-separated-parents-during-the-covid-19-crisis/
*Revitalising American diplomacy: Why Mediation support should be part of the foreign policy re-build   https://brook.gs/3fPBwEH
*Neuroscience & Kindness/Compassion: The connection between Mediation & Empathy   thriveglobal.com/stories/empathy-compassion-meditation-training-practice-ethics-psychology/
*The father of EQ reveals 12 ways to increase your EI   https://www.inc.com/jeff-haden/the-father-of-eq-reveals-ways-to-increase-your-ei.html
*Existential Maturity & what Emotional Intelligence (EI) really means   brainpickings.org/2019/11/25/the-school-of-life-book
*Mediation alongside Arbitration & Litigation - Eileen Carroll   www.youtube.com/watch?v=D8_Dmkfzo1o
*Is Mediation legally binding?   https://familymediationgroup.com/is-mediation-legally-binding/
*Should Mediators be required to be Attorneys?   https://bit.ly/25DkohP
*Arbitration agreements: Don't play chicken with imprecise drafting   https://www,allens.com.au/insights-news/2020/05/arbitration-agreements.../
*6 ways to become a more empathic entrepreneur    https://www.entrepreneur.com/article/
*Empathic design: Mapping your brain, brand & data    http://www.business2community.com/strategy/empathic-design
*Can empathy improve policing?    http://greatergoodberkley.edu/article/item/can_empathy_...
*Visit the world's first Empathy Museum    http://www.empathymuseum.com/
*8 ways to build customer empathy    http://www.heartofthecustomer.com/eight-ways-build-customer...
*How empathic understanding might assist in creating more compassionate policy options    https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/how-empathic-understanding..
*How to become a scientist of your own emotions: Cultivating EI in ourselves & in our kids   thriveglobal.com/stories/how-to-become-scientist-of-your-emotions/ .
*US: Bridging our national divide demands empathy & compassion    https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/empathy...
*Design thinking: Getting started with empathy    https://www.interaction.design.org/literature/article/design-thinking...
*Empathy can connect victim, perpetrator    cornellsun.com/2016/11/10/professor-empathy-can-connect-victim-perpetrator
*The dark side of empathy: How absorbing emotions can drain you    https://www.powerofpositivity.com/dark-side-empathy...
*Empathy & ethics    https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/empathy-and...
*Become a better leader through self-empathy    http://www.forbes.com/sites/forbescoachescouncil/
*Why empathy is key to 21st century business & why you should care    www.talentculture.com/why-empathy-is-key-to-21st-century-business-and-why-you-should-care/
*Doctors, nurses & empathy    https://theconversation.com/are-our-busy-doctors...
*Empathy, ethics & lawyers    www.law.com/sites/almstaff/2017/01/12/how-vws-in-house-lawyers-screwed-up-a-litigation-hold/
*Becoming powerful makes you less empathic    https://hbr.org/2015/04/becoming-powerful-makes-you...
*7 ways to develop empathy    http://www.patrickwanis.com/7-ways-to-develop-empathy/
*6 facts about empathy    https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/tech-support/...
*Empathy is actually a choice    www.nytimes.com/2015/07/12/opinion/sunday/empathy-is-actually-a-choice.html?_r=O
*A little empathy makes good leaders great    https://www.entrepreneurs.com/article/
*Finding the limits of empathy    http://campaignstops.blog.nytimes.com/2012/04/29/finding...
*Conservatives are happier than liberals, but only because they lack empathy    www.thejournal.ie/conservative-liberal-happiness-social-welfare.../
*The importance of helping your kids to develop empathy    http://internationalchoolparent.com/empathy-children/...
*Empathy: One of the keys to my business success    https://www.garyvaynerchuk.com/empathy-one-of...
*US: Bridging our national divide demands empathy & compassion    https://psychologytoday.com/blog/empathy
*Empathy, Schmempathy: Paul Bloom on why we should feel less    https://www.facebook.com/MarkBBaerEsq/posts/...    www.chronicle.com/article/empathy-schmempathy/238478
*3 kinds of empathy: Cognitive, Emotional, Compassionate    http://www.danielgoleman.info/three-kinds-of-empathy
*Is empathy hardwired in the brain or do we learn it through experience?    http://trueviralnews.com/is-empathy-hardwired-in-the-brain...
*What's the matter with empathy?    greatergood.berkley.edu/.../whats_the_matter_with_empathy
*The most powerful type of empathy: Heyoka    www.higherperspectives.com/heyoka.1703065316.html
*Does your Doctor need to show greater empathy?    www.livescience.com/57121-doctors-empathy-patient-care.html
*The downside of empathy    http://thebossshow.com/2016/12/04/the-downside...
*Listen to this woman's message about having empathy for others    huff.to/1Vd92rL
*How we understand others: Excessive empathy can impair understanding    http://medicalxpress.com/news/2016-04-how-we-understand...
*The power of story-telling: How to build empathy with the right narrative    https://zapier.com/blog/power-of-empathy/
*Acetaminophen (popular pain killer) linked to lower empathy levels    www.livescience.com/54739-acetaminophen-linked-to-less-empathy.html
*Communication skills & techniques: Showing empathy    http://www.flyingsolo.com/marketing/communication-skill
*Why acting as one company isn't easy: The link between empathy building & collaboration    www.strategy-business.com/blog/why-acting-as-one-company-isnt-easy
*Importance of empathy for lawmakers & mediators    https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/importance-empathy-our-work-lawyers-mark-b-baer...
*Study: Wealthy children don't grow into the best leaders: Have lower level of empathy for others    www.scoop.it/t/empathy-and-compassion/p/4064275696/2016/05/24/study-wealthy-children
*How do children learn empathy?    https://theconversation.com/how-do-children-learn..
*Why is empathy so important?    http://www.lifehack.org/402899/why-is-empathy-so-important
*4 ways to raise empathic kids    http://www.beliefnet.com/love-family/parenting/galleries/4...
*The importance of empathy    http://www.linkedin.com/.../importance-empathy-our-world
*Why Danish students are happier & more empathic    http://www.theatlantic.com/education/
*How to raise an empathic kid in a selfie-obsessed world    http://www.popsugar.com/moms/how-raise-empathic-kids...    
*Why teaching kids about empathy is important & the book that shows you how    http://www.chicagonow.com/between-us-parents/2016/06/teaching
*The strategist: Empathy is the new management    http://www.thestrategist.media/empathy-is-the-new-management...
*Empathy: Have you got it?    www.mybinternational.com
*Black lives matter: Building empathy through reading    http:www.yalsa.ala.org/thehub/2015/01/19/black-lives-matter
*Empathy & 13 kids' books    https://tinybop.com/blog/13-books-to-spark-conversation
*Brain's empathy centre identified    http://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/...
*The importance of empathy    https://www.susan-ingram.com/2016/08/the-importance...
*8 books that teach empathy for kids with special needs    http://coolmompicks.com/blog/2016/08/18/back-to-school...
*Empathy in healthcare is valuable    http://www.berksshireeagle.com/health/...
*The neuroscience of empathy    http://www.6seconds.org/2016/08/28/the-neoroscience-of...
*Student empathy    https://blog.k12insight.com/2016/09/02/student...
*Empathy promotes altruistic behaviour in economic interactions    http://www.nature.com/article/step31961...
*How books can teach your child empathy    http://blogs.wsj.com/speakeasy/2013/08/07/why-reading...
*Are dancers more empathic?    http://dancemagazine.com/views/scientific-reason-dancers...
*The importance of teaching empathy to pre-schoolers    http://www.collective-evolution.com/2016/08/01/the-importance...
*I don't feel your pain: Overcoming roadblocks to empathy    https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/threat...
*In defense of Judicial empathy by Thomas Colby    https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/excerpts-from...
*The empathy business is growing quickly    http://www.hcplwe.com/physicians-money-digest/contributor/
*Narcissism vs Empathy   https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/peaceful-parenting/201901/narcissism-versus-empathy
*7 principles that influence our behaviour   https://uxplanet.org/7-principles-that-influence-our-behaviour...
*Empathy is good, justice is better   https://www.patheos.com/blogs/rogereolson/2019/01/empathy-is-good-justice-is-better/
*Corporate options when using external Dispute Resolution expertise: Practice Notes   https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/corporate-options-when-using-exernal-dispute-resolution-expertise-david-nyheim
*3 Negotiation tips for women in Engineering & Technology   https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/top-3-salary-negotiation-tips-women-engineering-kristin
*Empathy by design: Healing the body while caring for the mind   https://www.washingtonpost.com/sf/brand-connect/cleveland-clinic/healing-while-caring-for-the-mind/
*How empathy can save the world   https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/hope-resilience/201907-how-empathy-can-save-the-world
*Developing empathy in early childhood   https://www.parenttoolkit.com/social-and-emotional-development/advice/social-awareness/developing-empathy-in-early-childhood
*Mixed method Mediation   https://amzn.to/2nwu382
*Empathy Communication, Motivation & Conflict   https://prezi.com/_p5pk4gk4ove/empathy-in-communication-motivation-and-conflict/
*Empathy is the key to conflict resolution & management   https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/empathy-and-relationships/201702/empathy-is-the-key-conflict-resolution-or-management/ 
*Empathy is a muscle: Build it   https://inspireleadershiptoday.com/2019/10/empathy-is-a-muscle-build-it/
*Mediation Advocacy requires a new set of skills   https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/mediation-advocacy-requires-new-set-skills-robert-amgyal-sc
*"No one wins in court" - Family Mediation Group (USA)   https://www.linkedin.com/feed/#
*Religions & Mediation   https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/religions-mediation-fred-jandt/




 





1 comment:

Unknown said...

Understanding the conflict parties, their resources, their grievances, their contexts etc., are very key aspects of mediation. Hence, taking it from the dimension of empathy, there is a lot that one can learn from a conflict party's statements and rhetoric, especially where such come in the form of retortions. An aggressive conflict party betrays a lot easily, and it even makes the work of the mediator easier... But the mediator should not be tempted to think that the non-aggressive party may not have an equal right to speak and air out their views and grievances simply because they may be calm and well collected. in such a situation, if the mediator does not stick to the rules of neutrality (even if it were just a hint of such weakness), the situation may degenerate and all the gains obtained may fly away.